The Husband With X-Ray Vision, Conclusion

Hellllllloooooo!

Hey, I'm even on time. Yay! Happy Fourth of July (for those of you in the US)! Hope you're going to have lots of barbecues, fireworks and beer! As for me, I'm writing a new book and that's all I care about right now. So that's what I'll be doing. Maybe go check out the fireworks, I don't know.

So I hope you had a great week and I hope next week will be even better.

Here's the conclusion of The Husband With X-Ray Vision, soon to be found in Spank Me, I've Been Bad. Have to say, this is one of my favorite of Gerry's pranks. Next week, I'll return with yet another Rob and Gerry story.

Hugs to you all!

Michelle


Next day, Rob was more determined than ever to figure out what his wife was up to. It must be pretty bad if that spanking didn’t make her confess. He searched her car for information. Nothing. He spent quality time in the attic. Zip. He did, however, find some boxes moved in the corner. He guessed that’s where she’d hidden whatever it was she’d used on Harriet. But he found nothing else.

And Gerry wasn’t talking. She brooded over breakfast, but after he grabbed her, kissed her and made love to her on the kitchen table, their feud ended. Besides, to catch her, all he had to do was wait. She’d blow it soon, he knew it.

Over the next week, Rob paid close attention to Gerry and news of the neighborhood. Specifically Harriet Gould. But he heard nothing.

Two weeks after he’d spanked Gerry, he was taking a walk when he ran into Harriet Gould herself. She looked terrible. Her hair was whiter than he ever remembered it and her face looked… well grayish, almost with a tinge of blue. She was as nasty as ever, off to go tell someone their lawn was longer than the association rules allowed. He watched her as she marched down the street. What made her look so awful?

“She looks bad, doesn’t she?” came a voice from behind him. He turned, it was Barbara, one of their closest friends.

“What’s wrong with her?”

“The idiot was taking colloidal silver for some health supplement. She stopped months ago, but I guess she’d taken enough for it to be too late. She’s been diagnosed and everything. Got something called argyria. She’s actually turning blue.”

“You’re kidding me.”

“No, I’m not. But I don’t get her hair. Neither does she. She said she uses her normal hair dye, but it started turning her hair white. She thinks it’s related to the silver thing. Your wife is sure enjoying her transformation. So is everyone else in the neighborhood.”

“I’m sure.”

“Well, gotta go,” Barbara said. “See you guys on poker night.”

“You bet.”

Rob raced home. Gerry was out, he needed to get into her computer. He knew what he was looking for now. He went onto the Internet and checked her searches for the past few months. It didn’t take long before he hit pay dirt. His lovely wife had done extensive research into colloidal silver. He dug a bit further and found the evidence he was looking for: an order for colloidal silver, dated two months before. Along with the name of a local store that carried it.

She was dead. He had her, he finally had her.


Later, Gerry walked in the front door after having worked out at the gym. “Honey, I’m home.”

“In here,” he called out from the living room. She walked in, her eyes went to the paddle. She froze, her eyes widened. He twirled the paddle in his hands and glowered at her.

“Strip and bend over the chair, Gerry,” he said.

Her entire body began shaking. “But… Wait. I haven’t done anything.”

Rage flooded his body. “I know. I know all about it. What you’ve been doing.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“That will cost you an extra ten. Every lie out of your mouth costs you an extra ten. You’re up to sixty with this. You really want to continue on?”

Tears sprang into her eyes. “I… don’t…”

“I found the order for colloidal silver. I don’t know how, but you’ve been breaking into Harriet’s house and putting silver into something of hers. You heard about her problems with the silver. You decided to help her, didn’t you?”

Her eyes went blank, her mouth hung open.

He pointed at his chair. “Over the chair, now.”

She held up her hands defensively in front of herself. “Wait, wait, wait. I don’t know—”

“Seventy. Bend it over. I know, Gerry, I found the order, I know what you’ve been doing. Strip and bend it over. Don’t lie anymore to me.”

Gerry exploded. “Goddamn it! I was good! I left no evidence! This is not fair!”

He couldn’t believe her audacity. “I said, strip!”

Tears streaming down her face, Gerry obeyed. She seemed more angry with herself than afraid of the paddle. Her expression drooping, she walked over and bent over the chair.

“Damn you, young lady. All the lies upon lies upon lies. You deserve this. You made this happen. Very disappointed in you.”

“You are? I got caught. I’m twice as pissed, believe me.”

Furious at her complete lack of remorse for her heinous act, Rob swung the paddle far behind him and came down across both cheeks with as much force as he could muster. She yowled, leapt up and grabbed her ass, dancing from foot to foot.

“Bend over that NOW!”

“No, Rob!”

“You broke into her house and poisoned her!”

“So what? She deserved it!”

“Bend over!”

Sobbing, she obeyed him. Her gorgeous white ass had an angry red mark in the shape of the paddle across both buns. He got hard. This woman needed a lesson. She would obey him. Even if he had to paddle her into the next century to make her.

He swung the paddle like a baseball bat, aiming his strikes perfectly across both buns. She yelped and sobbed and begged him to stop. But Rob had only just begun.

He relished this. She bold-faced lied to him, how many times? How many times had she stood there with lies tumbling out of her mouth? And she thought it was all justified! She was poisoning some woman, could wind up in jail, yet she was convinced she was some valiant warrior, a white knight protecting the neighborhood. Crazy!

One after the other, he let his anger fuel his swats. She would not disobey him again. Her legs shook, her body wracked with sobs, her fists balled, her face was flaming red. He stopped for a moment. She collapsed against the chair, sobbing.

“Where did you put the colloidal silver?”

It took awhile for her to speak. “In her water and face cream.”

He fired one into her. She leapt and screeched, but stayed in position. “Why is her hair turning white instead of blonde?”

Through her sobs, she managed to say, “I switched out her hair dye and put three times the bleach in it.”

“Why? What the hell are you doing?”

“Turning her into a Smurf!”

It took a full few seconds for Rob to get his head around this statement. Then he burst out laughing. Soon, he was belly-laughing. This was probably the funniest—although most horrible—thing he’d ever heard of. And unfortunately, the witch almost deserved it. Almost. Rob had to get a hold of himself. He had just a few more points to make.

He powered one into her, she yipped. “Now just because this happens to appeal to my sick sense of humor, does not mean what you’re doing is all right!” A nice hard one, another shriek. “You (swat) are (swat) poisoning (swat) someone (swat, swat, swat)! You are done!” Another series of swats. “Do you hear me? Done?”

“I hear you, I hear you!” she screeched.

Even though Rob was not near his promised seventy, it was clear he’d made his point. Her rear was bright red, mottled with purple spots, her legs shook like they were made of jello.

He threw the paddle aside, turned her around and picked her up in his arms. “Listen you, you stop all this. No matter how much she deserves it, no matter how funny it is, you stop. This is serious, honey, I’m worried about you.”

“Oh, I’ll stop. I was done, anyway. She’s a human Smurf, isn’t she?”

“Please don’t make me spank you again. Just let me lie to myself and believe that I got through to you.”

“Oh, I got my lesson. I’ll stop,” she said, sniffling.

Rob gazed down at her as he carried her to their bedroom. Why did all her shenanigans make him so hot for her?

He must be as crazy as she.

©2007, Michelle Carlyle